Shift

Again a huge gap in time to cover...I suppose I'll work backwards then, from what my terrible memory can recall.

Avlynka stepped down as CEO of Teraa Matar. It was a terrbily sad thing, but at the end of the day what matters is that everyone's still friends and tight-knit. A corporate ticker is a tiny, pale thing as compared to clan Marks.

This means Kikia has stepped up as CEO, and it is a major toll on her. It's not enough that she's pregnant when in her non-combat clone, but now she has to juggle leadership with everyday life. I will help her as best I can...and give my one-hundred percent.

The Kenkii is definitely more silent now. It bothers me. I miss when there was music and ritual going on in the commons. I only hope we can bring it all back and then some.

Into the Vat

I need to get away for awhile. Very few people seem to have any sort of confidence or trust in me. Some in Electus Matari still think I'm a Sansha spy. Kikia says I'm to blame for her feelings of isolation. So...there are perhaps two, maybe only one, people (or person) that really understand me and where I'm coming from. That's fine....not really. I love the family that Teraa Matar has become. So I will keep going on and studying for my Voluval. In a Dream. The real world is just stupidly hostile and distracting for the moment, and according to folks it's my fault. So the solution is simple: retreat from the scene for a bit and wisen up. So I'll be spending roughly a week connected to a VR interface, contemplating things.

For the more active reader of these logs, should you exist, you may still contact me via NeoCom mail. Physically I'll still be at home in the Kenkii, but mentally I'll be AUs away.

Scattered

I'm really not sure what to record here anymore. The daring exploits are becoming fewer and fewer. I suppose I could talk about working with the various Tribes and such...it's nothing unique, really.

Mostly, I just feel like everything in life has come to a standstill. The person I love most may (and probably does) not feel the same way for me. So....I'm rather fucked, to be quite blunt. My dreams of settling down on Matar and being some sort of family man and clan elder are quickly being replaced by a future with me doing the same exact shit I'm doing now. I don't know if I can handle another decade of this.

I do not ask for an easy path. I do ask for someone to tread it with. I simply cannot bear seeing such sights along the way and not being able to share them.

Correct

Well....I was right. And wrong. Whatever. Kikia's back, and that's all that matters.

As an aside, I could almost do ground combat for a living. I feel like I'm better at piloting a light attack vehicle than a Rifter....

Silence

It all makes sense now....the pieces have come together. Someone has been capturing us, one by one! I look through the corporate logs and many of us haven't reported in for months! Months! There is someone whisking us away....I won't have it. I won't!

Crypt

Fury will always be in my heart. Even in hisec, which I have not visited for over a year, I find myself thrashing the slavers about. There was an incident involving an Angel Cartel fleet; I may face court martial. Whatever. So after updating these logs I'm going to disconnect all the interfaces from my pod and just float, clearing my mind. It might do me some good.

Truth

Today was pretty intense. There was some battling in Dal over complexes. Anya, Conventia, Samantha, myself, and a newer pilot named Kerono all worked hard at ending the Amarrian occupancy there.

Of course, as large a dent as we put in their system-wide security networks, we didn't get a shot at the bunker.

Oh well. I've managed to build two Arbitrators today, which is great. They are the perfect support ship for these sorts of operations, and should serve me well. After the flight I went over to the Last Gate for some drinks.

Astrid definitely does not approve of my drinking habits. I suppose she's right though. It really only helps me feel warm and fuzzy until the next morning when I wake up.

Path

Yesterday was pleasant enough. I finally saw Kikia again...but she seems different. Greeted me as "Captain Jaiga", rather than any informal term of endearment or friendship. I suppose I shouldn't worry; her social implants she uses for her shaman work do that. I also learned about a rather awesome mixed drink of Quafe and Chest Wound; that stuff is great!

I went down to Stain via a jumpclone in Delve today. Managed to nab my primary blueprint library from the True Creations station in RLDS-R. The return trip was delightfully fun: I dodged many things in my Vigil.

Surprisingly, I didn't have a drop of alcohol to drink in RLDS-R. I forget that I never used to drink back in the Shaktipat days. A terrifying prospect, really. I'm just pleased I managed to grab all the blueprints safely; it's harder to find some of them these days...

I suppose I should get to building Arbitrators, now that I can. I think it would be pretty awesome to have a squad of those causing trouble for the Imperials.

Inferno

They will burn. Every single one of them, with their noses so high in the air.

If they will not be humbled, then it is their blood which shall fill the Valley.

Elixir

I need....lust for...certain things.

I want to feel an unconditional love like no other. One that is universal, binding, and guiding. I want absolution, forgiveness, and light. I want warmth that will never leave in the middle of the night. I want someone I can lay down with to reciprocate my body heat. Someone that can inspire fire and passion; new life.

Some people call this something or someone God. Others call it a lover.

For me, it is currently a bottle of Chest Wound.

The People Prevail

08:17:06 Notify This solar system has been won by Minmatar Republic!
One of my happiest moments in a long time.

Edifice

I've been in an unusually productive mood lately.

I helped Aphoxema with more of her assignments for the Sebiestor Tribe. Can't go wrong helping her and the Tribe out, really. The only thing I detest about being in Hakeri is that I'm nowhere near my factories in Vard and by extension the mineral-rich area nearby.

I've managed to get up to the level of cruiser production with little trouble. I've come up with a rather efficient method of extracting metals from the Sansha. Yes, it does involve force. Typically a mix of kinetic and electromagnetic, to be precise. I consider this a good thing, really. If ever Avlynka or Kalaratiri call for me to fly a cruiser in the Hed area I really have no excuse now. Even if it is just some basically-equipped Thorax with the largest plate possible.

I ended my day on a rather pleasant note, making lunches for everyone tomorrow. Sure, we're mighty and rich-beyond-belief capsuleers and could just order luxurious food every single night, but there's no fire to that. No substance.

Equilibrium

Things seem to be getting better. I made dinner..not sure how great it tasted to Avlynka and Aphox, but to my tastes it was great for an improvised dish. She's seems better....but I've been keeping tabs and eyes on her. Well, everyone.


I need to step up and do what I can. I may not be a hotshot combat pilot, but I sure as hell can listen to everyone's problems and talk with them. I really want to see us all together as a group...proper-like. If that means a freshly-cooked meal every night, then I do hope everyone can handle very sweet, rich-flavored food.


That's right Aphoxema. We must share the kitchen area.

Turmoil

She's not any better and still wants to do it, I think.

Why can't she See?!

If she goes, I may too. I can't handle this; not like I thought I could.

Steadfast

Today I awoke in a wonderful mood. I went exploring, in the wilderness of Mikramurka, on Pator. I ended up encountering a large furry creature which charged at me. In retrospect, I suppose given the direction of the wind it was able to smell me....I had to take the poor creature down with a few iron charges from my rail-rifle.

I suppose the claws will make fine trophies. I had heard of this animal...a "bear" I think it was called. A majestic creature.

It took me quite some time to arrange a shuttle back home to space. I arrived to very much less fantastic and happy conditions. I will not speak of the details. I just wish that woman would understand how much some of us care...how much I care. So I'm sitting here next to her in the infirmary, keeping a watchful eye on her.

I just hope I don't drift off to sleep! I want to catch her when she wakes up to evaluate how she's feeling.

Union

Today was....interesting!

It began with some relatively light ops in Arzad, once again beating back the Sansha threat in the belts there and converting the surviving scrap into usable metals. This, combined with some idle chat in The Summit, was quite fine. The people in that channel seem to think I lick Avlynka's boots or something though....perhaps they've never served in a military capacity. It would be foolish of me to not recognize my own bias and feelings but...whatever.

So that went well. We then celebrated the marriage between Astrid Stjerna and Conventia Underking. That event was the highlight of the day. It was a wonderful ceremony, complete with the smells of a local tree species and fire. Yet another thing excellently adminstered by Avlynka.

It was a bit odd when Esna Pitoojee showed up, but I figured he's a good friend to Avlynka and he seems nice enough. When he entered there seemed to be some sort of tension...not sure. Conventia took Astrid up on her shoulder and charged out at the quickest moment possible, so I'm not sure if the two events (Esna entering and Conventia leaving with Astrid in tow) are related. It didn't worry me so much until I saw vehicle tracks outside going off to who-the-hell-knows-where. Avlynka said everything would be fine, and within an hour we received word from Astrid that everything's fine. So my usual paranoia beated down, I went ahead and relaxed to drink some tea.

As long as everyone's happy, that's what matters. Everything else is secondary.

Defeat: Addendum

It's alright, really. They won't see what I have planned, the Amarrians.

Blood for blood. Even the capsuleers.

Defeat

I knew going in that I'd probably not make it out with an intact ship. But damn, what are you going to do? Let them hold on to your system and take your people?

I warp to the minor complex in Amarr-occupied Vard, knowing full well there's a Griffin and Catalyst there, with a Cormorant as backup. I knew the Griffin wouldn't at all try to move, so I opted to go for more shields and not even bother with a propulsion jammer. It worked, until the Griffin jammed me. Just two more salvos and it would have been down...opening up many more tactical options against the remaining two.

Typical Amarrian bullshit.

I then scouted around in a Rifter and encountered a Sentinel. Having piloted one of these things myself, I knew where its weakness was: an absolute lack of guns of its own. I kept a good fifteen kilometer range from the Sentinel, though this was still within his energy neutralizer range. No issue. I even took out four of his drones. Great. Too bad the Sentinel has sixty cubic meters of drone bay space....it was a long and drawn out loss.

At this point I figure I should at least try to make up for my losses and go mineral scavenging in the belts with my recently-built but modestly-fit Cyclone. A poor mistake. A suspicious-looking Drake was in one of the belts and they quickly locked me down. The Y-T microwarp drive was shut off by his scrambler. I was doomed, even with Hornet ECM drones on him. That too was a long and drawn out ship loss, lasting about two minutes or so.

And so, dear logs, the temptation to simply quit the combat profession against other capsuleers is tempting. One simply cannot win without superior numbers or equipment. Tactics be damned; the capsule makes it too easy for an opponent to win by slightly superior tech alone, nevermind numerical advantages.

It is frustrating that there hasn't been a ship engineered to rush into a group of enemies and detonate, inflicting massive damage on them. I would probably be quite at home with such a ship, and it would definitely tip the balance of power away from mere numbers and more towards those skilled in stealth and speed.

Anomaly

I usually don't make two logs for one day-period.

Today went alright. As I mentioned before, there was some minor skirmishing in Ezzara, and I managed to move some metals around and built a Cyclone. So that's good.

My tinkering went awry, however. Aphoxema appears to have gotten ahold of that datapad I swore I wiped; she found out everything. Not that these logs are particularly private, but rather they're just not very well-known. And I'm not sure if she only saw that paritcular log entry, or now sees every log entry. In any case, she's had some bad history with Nation and didn't want me to mess with any of the implants, regardless of what state of functionality they were in.

No, really. She microwaved them. In a microwave.

At least she didn't get into the biomass. But then those will be useless, without the implants. Looks like another trip to Arzad for a day of ironically harvesting Nation ships for metals and samples. It always seems like tritanium is lacking, after all.

Legion

Today was the second day in which I and Samantha Vosh attempted to engage enemies in Ezzara. Of course, they flee if they suspect they'll lose the fight and come back later with bigger guns and friends. Typical.

My recruiting pool is becoming strained. I am very picky about the crews I acquire, and so manning anything larger than destroyers tends to be a hassle. Avlynka wants to shift fleet tactics, which is wonderful and will lead to more crew survivability. It's just hard finding the right kind of people for the job. I am encountering the same problems I've always had in the empire-controlled sectors of space: lack of fanatic zeal. In this regard, I miss Delve and Stain. Got to adapt to the job, I suppose.

In other news, the toying with the implants hasn't really yielded anything new. Not that I was really trying to get any specific results as much as I was seeing what sort of use I could get out of the things. So far the only use I've found is scaring the hell out of myself whenever I see they're still communicating with their relays. In fact, I should probably clear and trash this datapad upon finishing this entry for fear of being tracked; I shouldn't have connected it to the blasted things after all.

Echo

It's been very quiet around the Kenkii lately. Everyone's too busy out in space or something, I guess. I miss Kikia, but her duties are quite important, so I understand that. Aphoxema's been cooking great food lately, too. I look forward to a corp dinner.

I've been taking a more active role against Sansha's Nation lately. It's...not an easy fight. Most others blow up Nation ships with little regret. I feel regret, because I know every soul aboard that Nightmare-class is nearly gleeful in knowing they've served their Master and his cause. You will never meet a crew in the cluster like a True Slave crew; so content with going down in flames.

I'm still not really sleeping, which is fine. I take up my night hours with experiments and pouring over raw data. I actually managed to find some True Slave samples more or less intact from a wreck in Arzad. Of course the host is quite deceased but many of the implants still work, if provided with power. I'll keep playing around with them, I guess. The implants, that is, not the biomass they were attached to.

On a side note, industrial production is up a bit. The wreckage from Sansha ships is great for scavenging usable materials to reprocess. My ambition is to begin battlecruiser production as soon as possible.